Friday, May 17, 2013

Feminism; Yea or Nay.

When broaching a somewhat sensitive and arguable topic such as this, I believe that it is of utmost importance to clear the air from any initial suspicion and state my side on this matter. Quite simply (And logically, if I may add) I am an advocate to equality. No, it is more profound than that, I insist upon equality.

So what is the use of bringing up the topic, then, if my mind is already made up? I don't know. Perhaps my boredom has gone to the point where it transforms into inspiration or perhaps because it bothers me much. Maybe because it's a popular topic to be discussed over some coffee but considering that my sociability is close to zero (Or in the negative), I'm forced to bring the topic here.

I'm going to be honest here and say that I don't know from whence feminism stemmed. Sure, a simple Google search would cure that supposed ignorance but then I ask myself: Does it matter? What use would it be to know the origins of an ideology but not understand the significance of it? I know the meaning of it and to me, that is enough. To support the rights of women and support their equality. That's it. Such a simple concept.

The fact that feminism has to exist is a testament to the failure of mankind. In fact, I believe that any movement that aims to stop the oppression and belittling of a group of people is a sad affair. It shows that we have a side to us that is so aligned to evil, so intent on establishing our superiority that we don't care at all about the fate of the ones that we so righteously attempt to rule over. It doesn't matter what race, religion or culture one is from. The very basis of being a good person constitutes looking at others and marking them as equals; if not in intelligence than at least in having rights.

I was brought up by a strong woman; much stronger than I am, truthfully. I was surrounded by positive role models in my family, our roots are very adherent to respecting others and so I was brought up with that value embedded deep inside my heart. It did not occur to me until very late that women were helpless, in fact I'm still finding it hard to believe. How is that possible, I thought.

So naturally I joined in. I donated the already meagre allowance to helping battered women, helped out with other charity work and once I even talked with a victim of domestic abuse. It was during one of these occurrences where I had my views challenged by none other than myself.

I was having coffee with a friend and she was telling me about a woman who was raped. This intrigued me somehow so I allowed her to continue. The woman in question went out to a club with her friends. At aforementioned club, she met a man who bought her drinks and so on. After a few hours or so, her friends decided that it was time to leave and went to collect her but she declined. She told them that the man was to see her home. One of the friends, of course, felt that it was not at all a sound plan and she continued to persuade her but to no avail. Giving up, the friends left. Long story short, the next day they found out she was raped.

So my friend asked me what I thought about it and at that point, I was conflicted. On one hand, I believed that it was the woman's fault that she so foolishly went ahead without sensing any folly in her plans. On the other, if I were to answer that, it would mean that I was ignoring this woman's plight by putting the blame on her. So I told my friend that while I understood the woman's pain, I cannot in good faith, absolve her from any blame. The truth was that she, without any prior thought to her safety, willingly gave herself into the arms of a man that she did not know at all and expected everything to turn out okay. Am I saying that she deserves it? No, not at all, rape is a heinous crime and should be punished by castration. What I'm saying is that she should have had the common sense to realise what she was doing.

Obviously my answer displeased my friend but I don't think the story would be of any interest. What followed was great because I had to stop and think about what I actually believe in. I want women to be safe, to not be harmed, to be able to go around doing what they do without fearing for their lives. That's a given. But I cannot fool myself into thinking that I don't care what they did to be placed in their distressing position. I'm not going to pretend that a woman who puts aside thoughts of safety and vigilance deserves my pity and help. If you go around being stupid and foolish and throwing caution to the wind, then what happens to you is your fault entirely.

Nowadays however, I'm greatly displeased to find that feminism has been twisted and perverted into such a hateful thing. I'm not going to lie; I've grown to earnestly hate this new feminism. A movement that once promoted equality for women has now transformed into this monster that demands superiority instead. Is it as bad as the SCUM manifesto by Valerie Solanas? Probably not. There is a minority that still believes in castrating all men etcetera but it is not the general consensus, thank God.

However, it still disturbs me. Well, what's the problem if women feels a little bit empowered, you might say. After all that oppression, don't you think they deserve a bit of slack? They're not hurting anybody by doing it, after all.

Well, what then is the use of equality in the first place? What is the use of dreaming of a future where we can all regard each other as equals if in the initial stages, we are already willing to give slack? What is the purpose of fighting for ideals when we aren't going to take it seriously?

The fact is, it is difficult. It is easy to say that one supports female equality but by observing the little details, we are faced with a tremendous task. True equality would mean that chivalry must cease to exist. A woman must get used to a life where your gender doesn't allow room for pampering. I know that people say that it's great if that's the case but I am not convinced at all.

Even now, when there has already been some achievements to this movement of equality, one still hears the lament of women about men who don't treat them the way they think they deserve. 'He didn't open the door for me' or 'He didn't pay for my meal' and so on. There is such a blatant double standard that it is really nauseating. All of this gives me the impression that the majority of women today are weak, pathetic creatures that cannot even open the door without assistance. Worse than that is knowing that they can but they are just too lazy to do so.

People are putting feminazi groups as the main threat to the feminist movement but I say that is absolute bullshit. The main threat to feminism is, unfortunately, the majority of the female population itself. They who believe that double standards are warranted, they who believe that women are weak and fragile, they who believe that men and the source of their problems but at the same time, believe that men should appear to them on glorious winged horses to save them from their plight.

So where does this leave me?

Yes to equality. No to feminism.