Sleepless Nights 33 - So what?

Elrond is a half-elf. I know that as a fact. He is the son of Earendil and Elwing and he has a twin brother, Elros.

Why? Well, it's simply because I'm a Tolkien addict.

My top five most awesome thing in the Universe or the Multiverse, however the frak you refer to it, are as follows:

1. Knowledge.
2. Human nature.
3. Manipulation.
4. Galactic Filaments, or simply the Uni(Multi)verse itself.
5. Chics dressing up as Darth Vader. Tight fitting leather of course. With the mantel.

Why? The first four are considered blasphemy if I were to find the actual need to explain it, but the fifth. Tsk, simply because Darth Vader has one and only one deficiency i.e. breast and the human genital system. And if a woman dresses up as him, it pretty much solves the equation to life which goes like:

Bet you didn't notice the heels...

I actually would take a portion of my time to debate about the Hippocratic oath. There's too many loopholes, so many flaws, and most of them goes against self-preservation of the physician. I bother to, when people would just look at it, shrug, say the goddamn thing and erase the whole memory of it.

I experiment on myself almost every single time something pops up which shows signs of being fucking awesome albeit the minor side effects of illness, etc etc. Why? For one, human experimentation has been disallowed by the fuckers who apparently transcended humanity by setting a code of conduct in Medicine. Hint: Ethics. Then there's the issue of, shall we say, minor injuries. If I do it to myself, I can only complain and whine to myself eh?

I listen to ABBA almost everyday and think that Dancing Queen is one of the most awesome songs ever. EVER.

I don't believe in offenses which is inflicted without any physical damage. You know, insults, extreme sarcasm and of course, almost always, truth. If you're acting like a fuck, then expect me to respond in a fucked up manner. Seriously, you asked for it and you do not have any right to whine and bitch about it. If you don't like it, then ignore, leave or come up with a rebuttal. And there you are, so prim and proper telling me that I should be more honest. Honey, if I am to be more honest than I already am, it's easier for me to hand you a gun and give you the moral support you need to pop a cap into your suddenly soft skull.

Now that you have known, stop fucking asking me.

My point:

So what if I'm a Tolkien addict? Does that make me a hobbit wannabe? Does that make me want to create my little own Shire with genetically engineered people and make 'em sing and dance while I smoke a pipe? So what if I have fetishes? At least I know to what extent I am fucked up and twisted in the brain. Do you?

So fucken what if I love to debate and point out errors and continue fighting even if it's a lost cause? That doesn't make me an anal retentive Mr. I Know Everything egoistic fuck. It just means that I like to question. So what if I manipulate? Hint: Everybody does it, the best example is this. Why do you ask your friends for help and not some stranger on the street? You know that there's a far bigger chance that you'd benefit more from these 'friends' and that's it. Go ahead and give me a lecture about the whole thing being based on trust and cotton candy, at least I am able to accept the fact and go for more.

So what if I listen to ABBA and memorize the lyrics to most of their hits? I was brought up with those songs playing in the car by the strongest woman I know. If it makes me a fag then fuck it, I'd be the most awesome fag in the world because I'd go that far for my Mother.

So what if I'm brutally honest? You deserve it.

Superficiality and shallowness. That's what's fucking wrong with the lot of you.

Hey look! It's you!

Cheers.

SInce We're on the Damned Subject...

'... There are no sequelae to the disease, the patient either recovers completely or dies.'

I guess that's why they made medical text convoluted and extremely complicated. Imagine a patient reading that. Yeah, someone told me that Medicine is '... an extremely respected profession, as soon as you get a Dr. in front of your name, immediately the general public will realise that you have an edge...'

We don't need Freemasons or the Illuminati in the world... All people need to do is dig a little deeper into the medical profession and lo and behold...

Best example is from the Microbiology book. After going on and on about fucken rabies, they restored their reputation by saying this: 'In developed countries, canine rabies has been controlled, so human rabies develops from bites of wild animals (bats, foxes, raccoons and shrubs.)

Did you miss that?

Shrubs. Here's a picture in case you're still not getting it.

I KNEW IT!

Yes, the most controversial scandal that has been unearthed yet... Shrubs have teeth (sharp ones) and they can bite and infect you with a deadly disease... The betrayal of the medical world... WHO'S UNETHICAL NOW?!

*

Enough on med ey. It gets you sick. Anyways, what's with the resurgence of Family Guy nowadays? It's like everybody is watching it... What happened to The Simpsons?

Sleepless Nights 32 - Hands Up If You're Drifting Away.

You know these kinda situations. You start out as best of friends then 5-6 years into the future, you look at each other and you realise that: Fuck, you didn't know the bastard after all.

Google search for 'Fuck, you didn't know that bastard'

My point is that people are meant to drift away. It's like a self-preservation mechanism or something; I mean can you fucking imagine living with the same person for a few decades? Sleeping under the same roof, smoking the same joint, eating at the same table. Wait. That reminds me of something. Something vaguely familiar... Something...

GAHHH!!!

Back to the main point. It sucks surely, not being as close as you were. Then again, if that person who you already grew to trust bla bla bla were to do something to fuck up your life, the damage would be so much more fucked up wouldn't it? Dammit, I've lost my train of thought.

*

I've had this thought in my mind for quite awhile now. Looking at our own body, in fact looking into it, it's actually plausible for us to be a cell in a much bigger organism. I mean who are we to say that our fucken RBCs or gametes or lymphocytes aren't in fact thinking that they're just another fully functioning organism? For all I know they could be sitting down, tanni gedegak-ing just like we occasionally do. Maybe they're looking up and seeing what passes as stars and shit and they themselves are thinking that 'Fuck, the universe is a fucken huge place...' when in fact, they're just cells in our bodies. And we might be the same. What if the Milky Way is just some goddamn tissue? If our own cells can be infected with a disease like fucking Plasmodia, then isn't that they're definition of being sick?

*

Is anybody else as obsessed with 'You Only Live Once' as I am? I mean fuck, how awesome can a song get?

Being 19

It just occured to me how utterly awful it is living life as a 19 year old person.

For one, 19 is an odd number, which simply means that its a number that equals that of an undecided nature. There's this constant demon that reminds me that hey, you were 18 last year, you had fun and shit. Now you're 19, the last year of your teenage life. And what are you doing? What the fuck are you doing with your life? 20 is coming, and so is responsibility. See, being 19 is like having a session with a psychiatrist and he asks me to look back and think hard bout my life. So I did.

I realize I'm a fuck up.

Then there's the issue of my teenage life coming to an end. How unfortunate that it's a big thing. I like being a teenager, I get away with a lot of shit. I get free stuff constantly and hell, being young is just fucking awesome. This thought keeps coming to me. This is my last year as a teen and what the fuck am I doing? Fucking wasting it in Egypt.

Heck, when this shit start to invade my mind, everything clicks together... I mean, looking at my first few posts, it seemed so fucking cheesy, disposable even. I'm not even making much fucking sense now.

I guess I'll wake up tomorrow and realise how foolish I've been tonight and laugh it off. Of course I am, it's fucking human nature isn't it. Dammit all.

41 degrees

Why is it so bloody hot... Ah fuck, more migraine then.

Anyways, I actually gained 10 kilos since I arrived in awesome Malaysia and heck, it doesn't bother me. Finally for once I actually got pass the 60 kg barrier.

For the first time in my life - I'm not shitting you on this - I did not go back to Penang. It's a funny feeling really, as if I've just lost something.

I finally understood what people have been saying about times changing and shit. Zip! Before you fucking know it, you've aged two decades. 'These are the times that you have to man up and show to everybody you parents especially that you can take care of yourself. No more fucking around, being an adult and shouldering responsibilities is not, in fact, limited to your age. You can be 12 years old when you become an adult, it all depends on the situation. Your time is now.' Thanks Bu.

Also, for the first time, I find myself with way too much material to work with. There's 3000 pictures from Europe which needs editing and fuck, so far, I've only finished Rome. Okay, I lied, I'm not even done with Rome. Fuck. Damn you Michel Angelo and whatever artists that made those awesome art.

A few days later, there'll be a wedding, then a few days after, back to Egypt. Oh and a test a few days later later. Yeah, life's good.

*

'I'm not even kidding.' She stared at him with a glint of annoyance in her eyes.

'I know you're not, and why am I under fire here? I didn't even mock you.' All he wanted was suspense.

'Well, what's your answer then?'

'Who am I to deny you of your love? The only thing I could do right now is acknowledge the fact. Yeah, you love me, now I know that but hey, you can continue loving me and I will say nothing to stop you.' She looked at him, in confusion and a slight tinge of anger started to smear her canvas of emotion. He down the rest of his tea in one gulp, flicked his cigarette and stood up. As he walked away from her, he muttered.

'Don't.'

Falling Madly in Love with Hope.

Hope Sandoval is the fucking reincarnation of fucking Eve.

Oh fuck, I'd starve myself till I die to get her to sing for me. God damn it.

Mazzy Star: Flowers in December

Sleepless Nights 31 - Well.

I guess I'm fucken back now aren't I?

Now try saying that in an Irish accent. And this part too if it pleases you. Great fun (Pronounced as fon).

Ah fuck, here we go again.