Some things have been really weird lately, and I'm not talking about all the earthquakes and tsunami and shit. People are making too much of a big deal over it, it's no fun making a fool out of them anymore. Ah, God, a 5.9 magnitude earthquake! Oh God there's gonna be a fucking tsunami! Oh God we felt it for about five seconds! Oh God!
Seriously people, fuck you.
Anyways, onwards we ride, leaving the fools to choke upon the obviously polluted air, to weird dreams. Only just now I had this fucked up concoction of weird stuff mashed together and tastes damn good with gravy. The dream started with my Dad's birthday and we all had presents and stuff. I knew I had mine in my bag and proceeded to take it out while my Mom watches and out it came... I uh... I had a trophy of come sort but then I took out another thing.
A crab. No. A flying crab.
Yes. A flying crab. Well, more like hovering, it didn't have wings or anything but it didn't make it less weird. I gets worse, my friend.
I actually was surprised or in more understandable terms, went 'What the fucking fuck?' but I guess it was mainly due to the fact that it was a lucid dream. Then as the crab hovered around, I remembered my Mom laughing and asking me why'd I get a crab for my father. Something in me might've thought that he would want to eat it but I'm not really sure. So we were getting ready to go to where my Dad was when I realised I left my bag which had stored the trophy and hover-crab (Ho-Crab? HoverAb? Hover-E-Crabby?) when a person attacked me. Well... A person might be sugar coating it. It was a man with the face of a frog, red-skinned and wearing shades.
And he kept on trying to hit me with a damn dagger and then... The Ho-Crab came to my rescue. It attacked the dude (Frude? Frode? Froge?) and flew around the fucker and eventually he... Something. I don' quite remember. What I do remember was somehow, the Hover-Ab got fucking insanely protective and tried to fight with fire and got roasted. I took his corpse and must've eaten him.
Anyways, we got to where my dad was and my dad kept asking me does he look old. And frak, in the dream, he looks like what I remembered when I was a kid, which would make him 40-ish and I told him that and it made him a tad bit jolly. Then the dream fucken ended because anymore of that and it'd turn into a nightmare... No more Hover-E-Crabby man, thats some weird ass shit.
Now, to another dream, I think this was the first time I lucid dreamed. Also, the first time I knew that my calling in life was being awesome but it's debatable. Some have said that as soon as I was born, the Lords of Awesome sitting high above their awesome thrones and were busy being awesome felt their awesomeness challenged by the awesomely born me. Digression.
So I was around an old traditional house and there were two middle aged men sitting there. This is not going to be some sort of fucking porn you pervert. They were talking about something which I didn't understand, then turned to me and told me that I was in line to inherit something. Again, not porn. They had to test me first, to see if I was eligible and for some reason I agreed. Which was a bad move. Never agree to anything shady people say in a dream. It'll fuck you up.
They morphed. One into a Shark-human thing...
And another into a huge badass fucken minotaur.
And they asked me to fight them. Seriously, how does that even fucking make sense... Still, I didn't have the time to question them cause one; they had weapons, the shark had his katana (Awesome, I know) and the minotaur had a club thing and two; they attacked me immediately. So they trashed the shit out of everything in the vicinity when eventually, we reach a room that they trashed and I dived behind a table presumably to fucking curl into foetal position and wonder what the fuck I did wrong. And they seeing I was in that state, they took a fag. I shit you not, they say down and lit their ciggies and smoked. Then they taunted me, pretty heavily and one of em, the minotaur I think told me that there's nothing to be afraid of since this is a fucking dream.
That made sense so I got up, threw the table at them which they smashed easily and I tried to take a swing at the Shark guy. He had this fucking barrier around him, like my punches felt as if they went into some wet cement and fuck, I didn't even hit him. So then they told me to stop and told me that I was not ready for it. I asked them to at least tell me and they projected a mental image of this fucking badass sword. Jeez man, that was one hell of a sword... But yeah, they told me I wasn't ready to inherit it yet and told me to go train some more. That sucked I guess.
There's so many more, fuck, all of em lucid. This shows that if left to it's own devices, my mind must never be trusted and should be locked away in fucking solitary confinement for the rest of eternity.
But of course, you really think that's gonna stop it?
Seriously people, fuck you.
Anyways, onwards we ride, leaving the fools to choke upon the obviously polluted air, to weird dreams. Only just now I had this fucked up concoction of weird stuff mashed together and tastes damn good with gravy. The dream started with my Dad's birthday and we all had presents and stuff. I knew I had mine in my bag and proceeded to take it out while my Mom watches and out it came... I uh... I had a trophy of come sort but then I took out another thing.
A crab. No. A flying crab.
 |
| CRAAAAAAAAAAAABBBBBB!!!! |
I actually was surprised or in more understandable terms, went 'What the fucking fuck?' but I guess it was mainly due to the fact that it was a lucid dream. Then as the crab hovered around, I remembered my Mom laughing and asking me why'd I get a crab for my father. Something in me might've thought that he would want to eat it but I'm not really sure. So we were getting ready to go to where my Dad was when I realised I left my bag which had stored the trophy and hover-crab (Ho-Crab? HoverAb? Hover-E-Crabby?) when a person attacked me. Well... A person might be sugar coating it. It was a man with the face of a frog, red-skinned and wearing shades.
 |
| The few times that even Google Search fails me... |
Anyways, we got to where my dad was and my dad kept asking me does he look old. And frak, in the dream, he looks like what I remembered when I was a kid, which would make him 40-ish and I told him that and it made him a tad bit jolly. Then the dream fucken ended because anymore of that and it'd turn into a nightmare... No more Hover-E-Crabby man, thats some weird ass shit.
Now, to another dream, I think this was the first time I lucid dreamed. Also, the first time I knew that my calling in life was being awesome but it's debatable. Some have said that as soon as I was born, the Lords of Awesome sitting high above their awesome thrones and were busy being awesome felt their awesomeness challenged by the awesomely born me. Digression.
So I was around an old traditional house and there were two middle aged men sitting there. This is not going to be some sort of fucking porn you pervert. They were talking about something which I didn't understand, then turned to me and told me that I was in line to inherit something. Again, not porn. They had to test me first, to see if I was eligible and for some reason I agreed. Which was a bad move. Never agree to anything shady people say in a dream. It'll fuck you up.
They morphed. One into a Shark-human thing...
 |
| Damn, anyone else miss this show? |
 |
| Yes, that minotaur. |
That made sense so I got up, threw the table at them which they smashed easily and I tried to take a swing at the Shark guy. He had this fucking barrier around him, like my punches felt as if they went into some wet cement and fuck, I didn't even hit him. So then they told me to stop and told me that I was not ready for it. I asked them to at least tell me and they projected a mental image of this fucking badass sword. Jeez man, that was one hell of a sword... But yeah, they told me I wasn't ready to inherit it yet and told me to go train some more. That sucked I guess.
There's so many more, fuck, all of em lucid. This shows that if left to it's own devices, my mind must never be trusted and should be locked away in fucking solitary confinement for the rest of eternity.
But of course, you really think that's gonna stop it?
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