Death.

I don't know about your life but my life has been surrounded with deaths these past few weeks. Not just deaths of the people, it's more than that. A death of a relationship, a death of an organization, a death of a fucking one eyed monkey. As much as I hate to admit it, it gives an effect that is... Right there, vocabulary fails me.

A few days ago my school teacher died. Then I had news that my friend's father passed away. I never knew my schoolteacher in a very close manner, he only substituted a class or two and most of the times I met him is because of unplanned encounters. So why the sudden feeling of gut wrenching depression and confusion? I try to think of it but I fail to comprehend. The best I could come up was with this.

As we move along in life, we are like sponge in a huge bucket of water. We obviously could not absorb all of it but sometimes, meeting a person once is enough leave an impression on you that you fail to forget them. For example once before said schoolteacher retired, I was being a bastard in school, playing truant and doing shit. One day he called me and my friend up to the Chemistry Lab and fuck, we thought we were gonna get some fucked up 'I-am-the-adult-here-so-don't-fuck-around' lecture. But he didn't. He told us this:

"You know, you guys are young, all this things are normal lah. You ponteng once in awhile nevermind, but then don't make it a habit la. If you do make it a habit, see la, you become like me. Can teach only, don't get a lot of money also. Once in a while, everyone needs a break, but then work is work, don't forget that."

The dude was smoking while he said that. In the fucking Chemistry Lab. God bless that man. See, he seriously surprised both of us who were there, we felt like we were speaking to someone who finally understands. And fuck man, he did. Now he's gone.

I feel like the world or at least Malaysia lost a damn good fucking teacher who could actually connect with the students. Shit, that guy should get a fucking Nobel for awesomeness.

See, those words stuck with me. When I heard he died, it was as if that very scene was playing right infront of my eyes. That and the part where he showed us how awesome Concentrated Sulphuric Acid is.

Best part is, I didn't even know my friend's dad.

In his case, when I heard I tried to put myself in his shoes. And I couldn't. I was afraid, I became paranoid, I was fucking hyperventilating. I cannot imagine myself being without a father who had been with me for so long. Shit, I still feel those demonic butterflies ramming into my abdomen.

So I hope that whoever is reading this, say a silent prayer for these people.

In memory of Mr. Francis Khoo.

My condolences to Mohd. Akmal.