Dream Girl

We all have our dream girls. We all do. You're a retard if you don't. It's weird actually... Usually we dream of our special someone to be perfect. Never having a flaw. Yet, it's funny how our dream girl have may have a million flaws yet we look at them and we go; 'Oh man... Look at her... Perfect... Just fucking perfect'.

I have mine. A childhood friend of some sort. We lost contact until we found ourselves attending the same highschool. As usual, me being the ignorant person i am never even realised she was there. Instead, i looked at the self-made goddesses and dream that one day, one day it might just happen. She (my friend, not the goddesses) was always there, handing out food occasionally. I always made bets with her... I remember one where i won five bucks from her from stuffing a whole green apple into my mouth! Those were good days...

School ended and our activities together became a memory. See, it's true when people say that you'll only miss what matters to you when it's gone... And i did! I mean, we contacted each other and everything but not having her by my side was what i missed the most. That was when i realised she was the one... She was my Dream Girl...

So i pondered on how to make her know. To people who really know me, they'd know that i'm a fucking coward when it comes to girls i like. Yes, i truly am. Basically, i was so afraid about it that i let it linger in my mind... I have my reasons. I think the most prominent one is that i was scared she would refuse and stop befriending me. That would kill me. For real.

Then finally, on the day i was about to leave for Egypt, at the fucking airport, i started to type out the message. The reply? She felt the same. At that moment, i hated myself for not telling her earlier, for being such a fucking coward. I sighed, and made for the airport gateway.

When i was here, i started to feel guilty. What i did was fucking selfish. She could have gotten another person which may have been better than me. Now, she has me as a restriction. So i decided to straighten out things. I messaged her. It went like this:

Me: What's been up/How are you etc etc
She: A reply to above
Me: Listen you aren't, by any chance, waiting are you?
She: For what? A bus?
Me: Uh... No... For you know, me?
She: You know me better than that Zuffie. No, I'm not good at waiting.
Me: Thats good to hear... I'd be guilty as hell if you did.
She: I'm sure you would be.

So yeah, i was crushed for a while... But then i told myself that it's a good thing. She deserves someone to be there in her times of need. I am, unfortunately, not that person. Sigh.

Holy fuck. I am waaayyy too emo... Seriously Egypt has fucking messed up my brain. Dammit...

Oh well, a story bout my dream girl. To Alexandrians: Pretend you did not read this.